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Three Classic Schmears

Yields1 Serving

Your own overstuffed version of three classic schmears.

Lox Schmear
 8 oz cream cheese
 8 oz smoked salmon (trimmings, if available)
 1 pinch white pepper
Olive Schmear
 8 oz cream cheese
 3 oz sliced green olives, Castelvetrano preferred (about 21)
 1 tsp chopped shallot
 ½ tsp salt
Vegetable Schmear
 ½ clove garlic, optional
 8 oz cream cheese
 ½ small carrot, peeled and quartered lengthwise
 2 dilly beans, or subsititute 1 oz. of diced pickled green tomato or olive
 1 tbsp sundried tomato (the softer kind), diced coarse
 1 tbsp italian or regular green pepper, seeded and diced coarse
 1 tbsp red pepper, seeded and diced coarse
 1 tbsp italian parsley, diced
 1 scallion, mostly white part, sliced
 ½ tsp salt
Garnishes to Consider
 ½ tsp fresh or dried dill, smoked paprika, diced pickled green tomato, capers, red onion, hot relish
Directions - Lox Schmear
1

Add the cream cheese, in thumbtip-sized chunks, to the bowl of a food processor. Drape in the salmon and add the pinch of white pepper. Cover and pulse 10 or 12 times, scraping down as needed. Don't overprocess; you want chunks of lox. Using a rubber spatula, fold everything out into a bowl. You're done. Except for a caper and red onion - or pickled green tomato, or whatever - garnish.

Directions - Olive Schmear
2

The Castelvetrano olives are a vibrant green and have a nice, fresh taste. The downside is, they nearly always come unpitted and are thus a pain to slice (though you get to chew on the pits). You can substitute Manzanilla or any other nice green olive of your choice. As with the lox schmear, just add nubs of the cream cheese to your food processor, tip in the rest of the ingredients, pulse a few times, and enjoy. This is nice garnished with smoked paprika.

Directions - Vegetable Schmear
3

Finally, a schmear that takes a tiny bit of prep. It's optional, but recommended, that you soften the carrot slices by parboiling them for two or three minutes, though you might prefer their native crunch.

With the food processor running, drop the half clove of garlic down the tube to auto-mince. Open up the bowl, chunk in the cream cheese and add the other ingredients. Do not overblend; I use from 8 to 12 very quick pulses, with a scrapedown towards the end. Garnish with fresh or dried dill. This is a family favorite, both alone and as a foundation for sliced lox.